the beard tax of 2016

Preface: Have not been to the barber in 22 years. Horse clippers and disposable razors serve the need. Throw them into alcohol when finished. Extends life expectancy tremendously. Compare this to the mountain man.

He would shave at the rendezvous in the spring when he sold his fur. In addition to their beards, they also shaved off their long underwear because the hair from their back and other areas had grown threw it. Razors were not available so they depended on their skinning knives and an Indian maiden, a good friend, or blind luck.

The moral of the story, I will continue to shave in the spring before the tax collectors come out of hibernation, stay clean until the first frost, and then let it grow after they go into hibernation. I guess a beard tax would not be a problem for me. By the way a shaved clam is appealing, but I am afraid it might go into hibernation.

The real beard tax is one that requires you have a beard, fine you if you don't.

Charge you if you do have a beard and put a hidden balloon payment if you do have an beard and exercise it.

Followed by raising the fine each and every year that you don't have a beard to the point you can't afford to get a beard pay the cost or the fine.

Require all barbers to trim your beard at a rate that ensures each beard customer costs the barber more that he/she is paid.

When someone fights the beard fine and take it to the Supreme Court the court determines it to be fine not a tax as originally stated. So instead of striking down the fine/tax the Supreme Court takes it upon it's self to re-write laws instead of judging if they are constitutional.

In the end it will be called the Affordable Beard Act and those in charge will declare it a great deal. Now even poor people can get beard insurance for as little as $75/month with a mere $6500/yr that has to be paid for beard trims before the government starts kicking a percentage.

Mike

as long as you have your beard for the required paperwork, and remove it once the day has passed.
one can avoid both fines and taxes and paying the barber..
They only ask if you currently have a beard... not if you had one all year

Originally Posted by NHscrapman

as long as you have your beard for the required paperwork, and remove it once the day has passed.
one can avoid both fines and taxes and paying the barber..
They only ask if you currently have a beard... not if you had one all year

* Facepalm * It reminded me of something.

Have you ever talked with someone and something they said just sticks in your head for years afterward ?

Quote: (From Old Rusty Nelo the Swedish Carpenduh)

" The government makes liars out of all of us. "

We have to pass the "Beard Law of 2016" to find out what's in it!

That's why I think I'll stay clean-shaven!