Sorry to hear of your difficulties. I am curious if you are adverse to some talking to some sort of professional(no answer required). I am wondering if there is money available to the children of Agent Orange for their health problems?
How much better were you when you had the work and purpose of the recycling business? In my difficult heath issues I found a great physical and mental relief in doing even very limited scraping. I believe it got my mind off my problems and gave me the physical effort to get me healther.
If you could join a group for therapy prior to your court date it might help. Don't forget many churchs run therapy and I would guess that every county in the nation has some form of couseling available at little or no cost. (social services and/or health department)
I am 59 and my brother is 56 and both have had short bouts of depression. We agree that most people who live long enough experience some sort of depression in their lives. I think that taking action even just posting here is a big step forward for you.
I respect your desire not to use meds but some sort of talk therapy may help you cope.
Do not feel obligated to answer any of the questions I have posed since I believe you have considered all I have offered. You are welcome to pm me if you desire. Mike.
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