2nd leg on the stool of sucess. ( Understanding)

UNDERSTANDING: It's probably the most misinterpreted or misunderstood of the three. When we speak it seems a flap covers our ears on many occasions and we stop hearing, not necessarily listening but hearing and understanding, a part of communication necessary for leg 3, Mutual benefit

We are all guilty of it on occasion, some more then others. Be precise, listen to the response, watch eye and body posture and be sure you and who your speaking to understand with out question. eye and body posture are very important, they will tell you things some ones mouth or message won't.

Not picking on anyone, WE ARE ALL GUILTY. IN an earlier post one member talks about loosing $3000 for not posting a trailer at the customers location. What really happned is probably the following: As I read the post my Understanding was a dumpster was mentioned and then the conversation continued. The customer didn't ask verbally for a dumpster, but did his eyebrows perk up, did he smile, did he lean forward, These all say ye,s yes, yes, a dumpster or alternative option.

In most sales situations a customer will say no 10 times before he says yes, but most important he will say yes 10 times before the sales person asks him for the order. If you are not prepaired to pick up any of those ten NONverbal yes's you will most likely walk out without the order.

Both parties, the talker and the listener must clearly understand what is being said AND
it is both the speaker and the listeners responsibility to make sure that happens.

I once went to a local yard to discuss them collecting electronic scrap, the owner (more typical ) saw me as just an old man that sold him computer cases now and then. He didn't listen because he miss judged me, his fault, nope mine, I didn't communicate clearly enough.

Later he came around to my way of thinking so I went back and explained Clearly to him how to separate , grade, etc. he called me back about 2 months with 8 Gaylords of boards. however the boards were mixed brown foreign, hi and low all mixed together.
He now has 12 Gaylords of mixed boards unsellable. whose fault? both, he didn't lsiten and I apparently didn't make it clear enough the importance of separating
the boards.

To sum up it is utmost important in today's wizbang world that both speaker and listener clearly understand not just words but gestures, body language, face, eyes, every detail of the discussion.

This is not from a text book, or any school but the one of 50+years real world experience

My last grade in formal school was 5th grade.

mcw.

Excellent advice. It is so common for people to talk at each other instead of to each other, to be waiting to speak instead of listening, and to ignore non-verbal communication as if it was unimportant. Thank you for your insight.